Two Experiences

Imagine living in a backward, impoverished country run by a tin-horn dictator with a penchant for the billy club and an outright disdain for the rule of law and democracy. Imagine scratching together a life savings, paying the bribes, taxes and airfare to get your family out of said country to the land of opportunity: the United States. Once here, imagine jumping through the bureaucratic hoops of starting a business so that  you could earn an honest living and provide for your family. Anyone who accomplishes this deserves my respect--they're what make America great.

While on vacation, our family visited Ellis Island, the first American soil millions of immigrants put their feet on during the end of the 19th and early 20th centuries. I was moved by the museum and buildings and marvelled at the prejudice and fear many immigrants faced from people who themselves were only second- or third-generation immigrants. "Thank goodness things have changed," I thought to myself.

Two hours after leaving the island, we were traveling through Connecticut, when Nathan had to use the restroom. Our window of opportunity for finding him relief before catastrophe is approximately equivalent to his age--a minute for every year of his life. I veered across 4 lanes of traffic on the New England Thruway and braked in a parking lot between two gas stations. One looked too small for a toilet, so we ran to the one next door, run by what appeared to be people of South Asian descent. No luck. No toilet, so I sent him to the bushes behind the stations, only to have the owner of the first station emerge, inquiring gruffly as to Nathan's activities. I explained sheepishly, in hopes that he had once had a son and would understand.

"You could have used my bathroom," he said.

"I didn't think you had one," I replied. "Sorry."

"What kind of gas station doesn't have a bathroom?" he asked.

"The one next door," I replied.

"They're a bunch of towelhead Indians," he spat. "They should be shot."

Gaping, I shuffled Nathan into the car and drove away, later considering all of the things I should have said to the miserable New England redneck. A week later, we were enjoying a meal in an Indian restaurant in the heart of real redneck country, Charleston, South Carolina, when we struck up a conversation with the waiter, a man from Punjab.

"America is beautiful," he gushed. "In America, it doesn't matter what color you are or what social class you come from. If you work hard, nobody looks down on you."

A Storybook Romance

Maybe marriage isn't about finding the one woman or man who was chosen for you "from the foundations of the earth"--unless, of course, you're a Calvinist. Maybe it's about making a relatively uninformed, risky decision in the midst of raging hormones, complete lack of experience and astounding ignorance about what the future holds. Then, take that decision and give it time, energy, commitment, blood, sweat and tears, and you get something that rivals a storybook romance. That's what I thought of after hearing this morning's StoryCorps episode on NPR. This is three minutes worth savoring: Seymour and Marcia Gottlieb

Where Are the Feminists?

While there was much to like about President Obama's speech to the "Muslim world", it also revealed a stunning naivete in his understanding of the Islamic worldview. His predecessor George W. Bush incorrectly assumed that democracy could be planted and would take root anywhere in the world, once a tyrant was removed from power. After all, everyone believes in freedom, right? Similarily, Obama has flattened the drastic differences between the Muslim and the Western worldview--and even conflated the worldviews of Arabs and other Muslims, as though they are a monolithic people who merely need to be educated on how similar we all are. Nowhere is this simplemindedness more evident than in his comments on Islam and women. I would expect that feminists will have a response much more eloquent than mine, but here goes:

The U.S. government has gone to court to protect the right of women and girls to wear the hijab, and to punish those who would deny it.

Huh? Wearing a hijab is not a "right" in many parts of the Muslim world—it's what women do to avoid being stoned. The real question is whether we support a man's right to force his wife to wear a hijab.

I reject the view of some in the West that a woman who chooses to cover her hair is somehow less equal ...


This is a straw man. I'm not aware of anyone in the "West" who thinks that someone with a head covering is less equal. This ideology is inherent in the teachings of the Qur'an. The head covering is a cultural/religious expression of a man's ownership of his wife and the belief that she should be seen by no one but him.

... but I do believe that a woman who is denied an education is denied equality. And it is no coincidence that countries where women are well-educated are far more likely to be prosperous.

Bravo, Mr. President! This is true, but you're building your argument on a presupposition that equality and prosperity are both positive ends--even when they may stand counter to one's religious views. Westerners value prosperity over religious conformity. Be assured that this is a value that your audience does not share.

Now let me be clear: issues of women's equality are by no means simply an issue for Islam. In Turkey, Pakistan, Bangladesh and Indonesia, we have seen Muslim-majority countries elect a woman to lead. Meanwhile, the struggle for women's equality continues in many aspects of American life, and in countries around the world.

It's ludicrous to compare the plight of women who may face job discrimination in the America with women who aren't allowed to have a job, drive a car, choose who they marry, have a say over how many children they may have or whether their husband takes additional wives. This is an insult to truly oppressed women.

Our daughters can contribute just as much to society as our sons, and our common prosperity will be advanced by allowing all humanity - men and women - to reach their full potential. I do not believe that women must make the same choices as men in order to be equal, and I respect those women who choose to live their lives in traditional roles. But it should be their choice. That is why the United States will partner with any Muslim-majority country to support expanded literacy for girls, and to help young women pursue employment through micro-financing that helps people live their dreams.

Thanks, Joel Osteen--I mean, Mr. Obama. These platitudes only reinforce the inadequacy of political leaders to advance a truly effective solution to the clash of civilizations. The only real change will occur in the pockets where people of both Western and Islamic culture encounter and submit their worldviews to the radical demands of the Cross, which require that they love one another.

At What Point ... ?

Christianity Today's insightful piece on Jon & Kate + Eight incited quite a few interesting comments--from the unusual "I'm an agnostic, and thanks for admitting that this is an embarrassment to Christianity" to the usual "What business is it of yours to judge them?"

I haven't watched the show. Come to think of it, I haven't watched TV since the election ... has that HD thing started yet ... is my TV obsolete now? As for the "judging" comment, I'm surprised people are still throwing up the "don't judge me" defense. At what point does it become okay to call into question the behavior of another self-described Christian? Here are a few starting points in my book:

• When you pass yourself off as a happily married, leader of the evangelical movement and are exposed as frequenting a male prostitute and attempting to buy crystal meth.


• When you gun down an abortion doctor in the middle of a church service.


• When you serve as an usher in your church but are considered one of the top three go-to guys in the country for women who want a late-term abortion.

Or, a little closer to home ...

• When you call yourself a Christian but snap at your wife and kids at least once a week, often put your own needs before those of others, covet other people's stuff, neglect to pray when you get into a tough situation and regularly deal with lust, pride, anger, jealousy, etc.

Yes, it may become necessary for you to judge me at some point.